Sunday, June 29, 2014

Why the Hell Did I Go to the Gym?

In the age of instant media and glorified stick figures, I find it hard to look in the mirror and be 100% satisfied. I personally am obsessed with fashion and the way the industry works, but one thing that always bothers me is the standard of being thin and a size zero. No matter what when I look in the mirror, I am no Victoria Secret model. I guess that makes sense. Afterall, I am only 5'1" with no thigh gap. Also my boobs are not that large. Nonetheless, a killer bod wouldn't be all that bad. Today I decided I was fed up with the person I saw in the mirror and decided to go to the gym with my father.

Well, let me tell you, that sure was an adventure. (well not really but I like to think of myself as a good story teller)
First I had to get off the couch and we all know how well that went for me. Getting out of PJs and not taking a shower directly afterward should be a sin. I'm not okay with it. As a religious morning shower girl, it was strange to be putting on a bra before I showered. Never mind leaving the house without a shower. That felt like a sin in and off itself.
Then we finally got to the dreaded place and I stare at the treadmill like "buddy, it's you and me." But tbh, the treadmill sucks and we are not friends so I decided to do my cardio via the elliptical.  idk but am I the only one who thinks running in place just seems pointless? What's my goal? Where's my end point? How do I know when I'm done?

But then I kick ass on the elliptical and get roughly 3 miles, or the duration of The Story So Far's first album, out of the machine before I call it a day for cardio. BTW angry breakup music like TSSF is absolutely perfect for working out and makes you want to conquer the world with a hot man by your side and crushing your enemies with your thighs. Idk maybe that's just me.
 then of course I see this guy I know there when I'm drenched in sweat and probably smell just as lovely. Eh, I'll own my sweaty glory. There are worst things in the world (like how I saw my evil ex-boyfriend while I was walking my dog at the beach tonight) (also this GIF sums up my life greatly and I needed an excuse to finally use it) (BOOM ROASTED)
All in all, I really hate the gym. I never find motivation to go. It's like I want to be hot and have a hot body and make boys swoon when I walk by but at the same time I really think a nacho pizza would be delicious right now. My own personal fitness works better when I have friends involved and it isn't in a sweaty gym. Like hiking, swimming, kayaking, running, walking, whatever game involves fitness, etc. I never liked gym class because if you were bad at typical sports, no one ever picked you. But my wrestling skills were always on point and I would have been hella good at any rock climbing activity. Anywho, the main point is find something physical that makes you happy and stick with it because being in shape is important for your physical and mental health. And being in shape has a different definition for every human being so don't let society's standard define what your body is comfortable in and feels healthy in. Also remember, it's not all about working out, eat right (but remember salads are never filling and don't let the man tell you otherwise)

Much Love,
P.S. you're probably in better shape than me
P.P.S. I probably eat bigger burritos than you

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